3 things going on right now.
1- The Bruins are in this series we’ve been calling the Stanley Cup Finals against the Blues. I’ve been told that this next game is pretty important. I’m not a big hockey guy. I wish I was. I wish I knew the difference between the Kyurechovs and the Lamenkos and the Gorbachevs (is anyone in the league named these names?). But alas. Hey. Go B’s kid. It’s parade time.
2- This shit with Big Papi. It honestly doesn’t feel real. David Ortiz is the most important athlete in the history of Boston. The most important. More important than Tom Brady, Larry Bird, Bobby Orr, Francis Ouimet, everyone. I don’t know anything about Bobby Orr other than that picture of him diving. Larry Bird definitely isn’t the most important player in Boston. Don’t get me wrong. Amazing player but he came to an organization that already had 50 titles. Tom Brady could be close because he has 6 rings. But Tony Eason and Drew Bledsoe also made the Super Bowl before Brady. I’d say Brady is the second most important athlete. But after 86 years of never winning a World Series and reversing the curse as the center piece of the 2004 team, David Ortiz is the most important player in Boston history. You could argue Manny Ramirez was more important to 2004 but 1. You’d be wrong and 2. David Ortiz was never almost traded for Magglio Ordonez so he’s more important. From his endless list of clutch game winners and walkoffs, to his 3 championships, to the speech after the marathon, to his 1 mile home run in Japan, David Ortiz is Boston’s athlete. You could argue that other players are the most important in Red Sox history. You could say Ted Williams or Johnny Pesky or Carl Yasztremski or Jim Rice, etc. but you’d be wrong because those guys have 0 titles combined.
Seeing all of the reactions on Twitter from Pedro to Tek to Tom Brady to fucking Obama, it’s clear that David Ortiz is the most universally liked athlete in the world. Maybe not even athlete. The most universally liked guy on the planet. It’s a debate between him and John Mulaney to be honest.
3- The Red Sox played a game yesterday against the Rangers. Chris Sale did the thing Chris Sale always does where he pitches his dick off. 7 IP, 3 H, 0 ER, 10 K and only 1 BB. He’s pitching incredibly this year. And people have finally stopped bitching about him throwing 93 instead of 95 as if Chris Sale is complete shit if he loses a gram of speed.
Benny started the game with a 2 run bingo and that gave the Red Sox the lead until the 9th. Wait. What happened in the 9th? Oh. Oh I’ll tell you. Just like Sale did Sale things, the bullpen did pen things and blew their 10th (TENTH! Tent and then an h at the end) save of the year. 10 times the Sox had the win locked up and somebody pooped their pampers. The Sox are 34-33 right now. I don’t know how many of those 10 the Sox came back to win but if it’s zero then we could be 44-23 if we had a closer. That’s first place in the East and one game behind Houston in the AL. Basically the 2018 team. That’s the difference. 2018 obviously had an established closer in Kimbrel and now we have this committee of blow jobs trying to lock down leads. I don’t know who the answer is. Is it Feltman? Is it Thornburg? Should Pedroia close? I mean he obviously knows how to pitch because he taught ERod how to throw a slider. Bartolo Colon? Trade for someone like Yates or Greene? Something just has to be done because this bullpen is aggressively horrible in the 9th. Just look at this tweet from our friend Jared:
Bruins are going to win (I hope), Big Papi is recovering at MGH and the Red Sox lose 4-3 in 11 because the bullpen is full of shitheads.
Anything But E 