I’m not in the mood to blog today but here I am writing my second of the day. Something to be said about being a man of my word. I could put this off and just said, “meh. I’ll skip a day.” But I didn’t. I didn’t do that because of the 6 of you that read these day in and day out since the beginning (about 4 very long days ago).
Plus holidays are pretty easy to distinguish. I’m also only doing holidays I celebrate so if you’re reading this hopefully you’re a Christian white person.
1- Christmas
To put anything else at #1 would be blasphemous. You mean there’s just a day of the year where I get money and shit I want/ need (within reason) just because I asked for it? I’ll take that 10 times out of 10. The food is good too. It’s not a holiday that’s boxed in by food. You can just have food people enjoy. Not many holidays with that kind of food freedom. Also you get to see your families and you aren’t at work/ in school. AND Christmas music goes so hard. No other holidays have hundreds of songs dedicated to it do they? No? Just the best one.
2- Halloween
Halloween is also a fire holiday. When you’re a kid you go around and get candy from people dressed up as your favorite superhero or something. Then you grow up and BOOM no candy but the parties are always fun. I’m not enthusiastic about many things but I always go all in for Halloween. It’s fun. Parties are fun. Seeing your friends dressed up is fun. Sure the next day is tough if it’s not on the weekend but Advil exists for a reason.
3- 4th of July
Sure celebrating the country you live in is great. But you know what’s better? The parties that happen on the 4th of July. Just an objectively good day. I don’t have a yearly tradition for the 4th and still manage to have fun every year. Some people go on boats and shit! THATS a day. Also the fireworks. Just a novelty that really only comes with the 4th. Otherwise they’re annoying and loud and unnecessary. But on the 4th? Patriotic. Brave. Fun.
4- New Years Eve
I like party holidays. Sue me. Everyone’s still riding the Christmas high. Spirits are high. And NYE was made for parties. There’s no families sitting around having a nice dinner at midnight. That’s weird. If you’re in the arena for NYE, you’re throwing down and so is everyone around you. That’s a FACT. Great holiday.
5- Thanksgiving
Memorial Day and Labor Day aren’t holidays for me. On their own they STINK . It’s the surrounding weekend that even gives them anything. I did have some trouble snubbing Easter here but I never minded how I dressed up for thanksgiving and as a kid I usually looked like a weenie on Easter. Also nobody gets dragged to church on thanksgiving. Big factor for those of you who can relate. I know the rest of the boys like slandering the food on this holiday but for all the bad there’s good. Stuffing goes hard. No two ways about it. The desserts are great. Sure maybe turkey is dry but you can have it with cranberry sauce or take a dinner roll and make a pilgrim sandwich or something I dont know. Get creative. Plus you get the parade and dog show. American staples. And football all day. ALL DAY. Tell me another holiday with that much action.
Anything But E 